Rants

My Bumpy Life

Over the last, I’d say 6 or 7 or even more years. I’ve been through hell with my mind. I’ve lost everything and gained it and lost everything. I’ve climbed mountains and I’ve fallen down them. I’ve seen myself thinking the bottle is the only way to help me escape the way I felt and was feeling. And it has taken me many years and one humongous life lesson to realise it’s not.
 
I’ve never been me for many years. I’ve been a ghost within myself. Many people will know the true me. I’ve been there a couple of times. But I’ve never stopped I’ve always lost that touch of being true to me. I got caught up in thinking of how other people look at me and how my own life changing decisions may affect them. And to be honest. I can do the world for everyone but who does that help. Not me. I’m not going to be a slave to myself. I’ve got to think about me. Don’t get me wrong I’m not going to become a selfish person. But we all need our It’s about me time. And I lost that, I drifted off my path where I was meant to go in life. I’ve had a 10 or 11 year (maybe) vacation. And it’s time to go back to me.
 
I’ve wasted that time. Well not really wasted. More of a massive life lesson. But making the same mistake over and over can only become a mistake once. Making it twice you’re just not trying hard enough to be true to yourself.
 
I’m proud of myself. As hard as that is to say. I’m glad I’ve gone back to my true roots. I know what I’m really like. Sarcastic, daft, annoying. That person you put up with because that’s just them.
 
To everyone who’s seen me at rock bottom to seeing me at my best. Thank you for dealing with me and understand and accepting who I am.
 
There is one thing I can promise, though. To everyone who only knows me for the past 1/3 years. The person who I am now is a totally different person you’re used too.
 
As my friend, Jake would say. “It’s time Liam was back” and I honestly think I am.
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